loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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