She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
