And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
