There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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