i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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