batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
