Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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