you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize