are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
