So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
