took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
