he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
