She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
