Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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