all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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