my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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