U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
You have to summon your inner elephant
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
