he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
