So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
