**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize