Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
