i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Randomize