I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
