Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
