dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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