Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
