i may or may not be watching the land before time
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
