Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Randomize
