names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
