I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
