we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
