smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
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