i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
