im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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