I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
