I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
