Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
