she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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