just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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