No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
