i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
