i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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