im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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