69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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