She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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