Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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