I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
