Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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