It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
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