Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
